Chapter 9

Evelyn was sentenced two weeks later.
Because she’d cooperated fully, and because she was sixty-two with no prior record, the judge gave her five years in a minimum-security facility, with eligibility for parole after two.
I didn’t go to her sentencing. I’d said everything I needed to say to her on that phone call. I wished her no ill will. But I didn’t owe her my presence.
I was too busy getting ready for my daughter.
The house my mother had left me—the one Grant had pretended to own—was renovated from top to bottom. My father hired a team of workers while I stayed with him. They replaced every window. Every door. All the floors. They painted every room in soft, warm colors. No more cold marble. No more rooms you couldn’t touch.
I turned the master bedroom into a nursery. Soft yellow walls. A white crib. A rocking chair in the corner. On the wall above the changing table, I hung a framed photograph of my mother. The one where she was twenty-six, pregnant with me, laughing into the camera.
“I wish she could be here,” I told my father one night, as we put the last of the books on the shelf.
He put his arm around me. “She is here. In you. In this baby. In every good thing you do. She’d be the first one in that rocking chair, spoiling that little girl rotten.”
I was thirty-seven weeks pregnant when my obstetrician told me I could go into labor any day.
“Take it easy,” she said. “No more lifting boxes. No more climbing ladders. Just rest. Walk around the block. And call me the second you feel the first contraction.”
My father took the next four weeks off work. He was going to retire at the end of the year anyway—thirty years of service was enough, he said. He wanted to be around for his granddaughter.
He turned into the most overprotective man on the planet.
He installed grab bars in every bathroom. He bought three different kinds of baby monitors. He took an infant CPR class and made me take it with him. He practiced swaddling on a teddy bear until he could do it with his eyes closed.
“Dad,” I said, laughing one night as he rearranged the diapers in the changing table for the third time. “Relax. You’re going to be a great grandpa. You don’t have to be perfect.”
He looked at me, suddenly serious.
“I have to be perfect for you,” he said. “Because I wasn’t there when you needed me. For six months, my daughter was hurting and I didn’t know. I’ll spend the rest of my life making that up to both of you.”
I hugged him tight.
“You were there when it mattered,” I said. “That’s all that counts.”
My water broke at two in the morning on a Tuesday.
I woke my father up by knocking on his bedroom door. He was out of bed in two seconds flat, already grabbing the hospital bag he’d had packed by the door for three weeks.
“Okay,” he said, his voice surprisingly steady. “Okay. Breathe. We’ve got this. The car is warmed up. I called the hospital five minutes ago—wait, no, I didn’t. I will now. Okay. Let’s go.”
I laughed through the first contraction. It hurt like hell, but it was a good hurt. A hurt that meant something new was coming.
The drive to the hospital was a blur. My father drove ten miles under the speed limit, one hand on the wheel, the other holding mine through every contraction.
Labor lasted twelve hours.
Twelve long, hard, beautiful hours.
My father never left my side. He held my leg. He wiped my forehead. He told me I was doing great even when I was screaming that I couldn’t do it. He reminded me of my mother, who’d had a twenty-six-hour labor with me and said afterward she’d do it again in a heartbeat.
And then, at 2:14 in the afternoon, my daughter was born.
She was perfect.
Seven pounds, four ounces. Ten fingers. Ten toes. A full head of dark hair. And the loudest, strongest set of lungs I’d ever heard.
They laid her on my chest, warm and slippery and alive, and I cried. Not the sad, scared tears I’d cried for six months. Happy tears. The kind that wash away every bad thing that ever happened to you.
My father stood at the foot of the bed, crying openly now. The tough Army colonel, completely undone by a seven-pound baby girl.
“Can I… can I hold her?” he asked, his voice cracking.
I placed her gently in his arms. He held her like she was made of glass. So carefully. So reverently.
She opened her eyes. She looked up at him. And she grabbed his finger with her tiny hand and held on tight.
“Hey there, peanut,” he whispered. “I’m your grandpa. And I love you more than all the stars in the sky.”
He looked at me.
“Your mom would have loved her so much,” he said.
I closed my eyes.
I could almost feel her there in the room with us. Smiling. Proud.
Everything I’d been through. Every bruise. Every tear. Every night I thought I wouldn’t survive. It had all led to this moment. To this perfect, beautiful little girl who was mine.
She was my second chance.
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And I was never going to let anything hurt her.
Ever.